Who Am I Really?

An inspirational story about someone's journey within.

Hey there, at some point in our lives most of us question reality and the morals that we have integrated into our lives. Whether those morals were given to us by those who raised us, or taken from the people we chose to surround ourselves with, they sometimes conflict with your inner self, and your heart begins doubting the actions you do that were once normal to you. I experienced this first hand during my time at sixth form, and I desire to share what I learnt from it, in the hopes that it may bring ease to other people who may be going through the same situations as I did.

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During the first term of sixth form, It felt neither exciting nor depressing to be finally starting education again after a long break. In fact, it was more of a void or a feeling of something being missing, and it wasn’t until a few weeks in, I realised I was missing my personality. it wasn’t possible for me to feel like I was my own person and it led to cutting off myself from the majority of people in the first and mostly second year of sixth form. I didn’t want to just take the personality of those closest to me, but I had no idea where to start from either, but what I knew for certain is that I wanted a change.

So, I embarked on a journey to find myself or who I was, and began experimenting on the different types of personalities I could take. Naturally, the first people you look up to are your parents or the people who raised you, and how their personalities and character influenced the aura around them. My family wasn’t strictly religious but we had a sense of God or religion in our home. Taking a leap of faith in that direction brought a lot of contentment with it, however there were selfish actions, done by those I took this trait from, that I strongly disagreed with. Instead I began to empathise with people instead of outright spouting opinions in people’s faces, and realised that a character of kindness is what I prefer to inspire and show to people, no matter how others treat you and how others put you down. Showing kindness brought a different sort of satisfaction within, one that couldn’t be altered by the words or actions of others. The most profound fruit that I took from this journey, is the fact that I could see the effect of my character and personality, spreading to other people, naturally people started to respect each other and me more when I was around them, and a lot of friends showed a personality of their’s that i had never seen before.

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I guess what I’m trying to say, is that you don’t have to necessarily follow the traditions and the natural stereotypes set out to you, whether that be in the privacy of the home you live in, or the society that laid out these “rules”. Don’t fear change, welcome it, experiment with it, find out how you can use such changes to better yourself as a person and inspire those around you. If you feel as if you don’t know yourself or who you are yet, don’t worry, keep searching, it may take years, but to be your own person at the end of that is well worth the wait.

I chose to keep anonymous on this, not because we should be afraid of what others will think of us, but because it’s a way to keep ourselves humble and to help other people realise that anyone, no matter how famous or unknown, can change :)

I wish you all the best and on the journey you may embark on, and I hope I have inspired even one person through my story. Thank you :)