Tackling negative thoughts- standing up to that criticising inner voice.
That feeling of creeping self- doubt is something I think that everyone can relate to. No matter who you are, I'm sure at some point in life you've heard that whispering inside you that you're not good enough and you can't do this. But, I'm here to tell you- you can. Whether this is something that affects you intensely or just occasionally, I think it's important to learn some tips to get that voice to quit.
Ways of dealing with negative thoughts:
Let it pass:
When it comes to these thoughts, don't give it the attention or strength to hurt you. Simply acknowledge, know that not everything that comes from your mind is accurate or is a fact. By doing this you can allow it to take its course and pass. Do not give it importance that it doesn't deserve.
Noticing the end:
When you feel the thoughts arising, remember to take note of when they end. This way, if you have the burden of facing them again- you can refer back knowing that if you could tackle it once, you can do it again.
Actively Tackling:
When it comes to negative thoughts it's often very easily to allow yourself to be consumed by emotion and negativity. Rather, try and use your own logic to reach more valid and accurate conclusions and consequently decisions. Do not allow negative emotions that stem from this to control you.
Examples of thoughts and ways you can tackle them:
I am not good enough:
Replace this thought with: I am trying my hardest and that is enough.
There is never a standard that is 'good enough' - it's a concept that should not exist.
Everyone is perfect just as they are: you are worthy of love and respect and happiness that is true regardless.
I am going to fail:
Replace this thought with: I will do my best and whatever that amounts to will be okay- I cannot give up without trying.
Failure is not something you should be afraid of because from failure we learn, and so good still arises from it.
However, do not bind yourself to this expectation of failure - do not begin with a perception of doom- you will be okay.
I'm a terrible person:
Replace this thought with: Everybody makes mistakes sometimes, but I have a good heart and I try my best.
Rather than focusing on the challenging aspects of yourself, focus on the good. Think of what you're proud of, and think of all the love you've shared. You're a beautiful person- mistakes included.
I'm not as good as them:
Replace this thought with: Nobody is perfect, and everyone has challenges that others do not see.
You are you and that is enough, everyone is on their own journey.
We cannot compare the sun and the moon, they both shine when it is there own time.
Focus on what you have and what you are grateful for.
It is so easy to get swept into negativity because of these thoughts, we've all been there. But next time a negative thought arises, try the techniques that I have listed.
Can you think of a negative thought that you've once had, and what you could replace it with?
x